Bo always preached tolerance.  He believed that people should not be judgemental.  Bo pushed the envelope a bunch.  One day, while he was in summer school he wore a dress to school to mess with the "homophobes" in class.  I never got to see him in this dress.  My friends from Japan did -- and took these pictures .




Last night I was touched by memories of Bo and his tolerance.  Here is an excerpt from a note I sent a friend last night after doing outreach:

"So, before I go to sleep tonight, I wanted to recount this small little sliver of grace and peace I felt doing outreach this evening.  Remember that the last thing I mentioned to you was that woman I was volunteering with -- and how I just didn't like her and was not looking forward to working with her again?  And,  how it was my hang-up and I was so judgmental (just like Bo always said)?

I got to YBR early,  and after reading the log and stuffing my bag with condoms and foot powder,  I sat alone on the couch and asked god to grant me the patience to just be with this woman tonight and accept her for who she is without personalizing her experience.  I wanted to get into a good place- BEFORE getting all preoccupied and agro -- so that I would not have a shitty time doing outreach -- just being pissed at her the entire time.  

When she showed up -- bummed out and complaining and not motivated to go -- I took a deep breath and I started asking her about her day and her life.  As we walked -- I discovered why she is so sad and so miserable -- and why she does some of the things she does that never made sense to me before.  She is young,  the same age I was when I had Bo and on the street.  Only she had her baby and gave him away so that he would have a better life.  And now she is off the streets and doing outreach and really missing her baby.  Whoa.......humbling huh?

I had the best night in outreach -- ever.  I was relaxed and open to the kids.  I didn't have the usual flashes of annoyance when someone reached into my box and grabbed a handful of condoms -- or bitched because I was out of socks -- I just accepted that things were the way they are just because.  I sat with these children and looked at their tats and drawings, and one even showed me the sonogram of her six month pregnancy.  And I kept seeing Bo in their eyes, and smiles, and shrugs, and shy shuffling feet.    In the three hours of walking and talking -- in the 120 kids I saw last night -- I got the gift of seeing Bo alive again -- through them -- because I stopped jumping to conclusions and passing judgment before I saw what was really there." 


So thank you Bo -- for helping us all to see what is really there.